In some of my previous videos I talked about boundaries, needs and emotions, all three very important components to live your healthy self.
Now, what happens if?
You deny yourself to set up healthy boundaries around yourself.
You deny yourself to communicate your needs or and
You deny yourself to feel into your emotions?
Damn right: You live in Self Denial and you reject who you really are in your Core.
You have put on a mask behind which you were or still are hiding. And behind this mask you play a certain role. But the ?Role? is not the True YOU.
The True YOU is covered up by the mask/role. And to keep up the ?Hiding? costs you a tremendous amount of energy.
Energy that you could use to propel yourself forward into a magnificent future.
My role for almost all my life, until a few years ago when I started to step into my power, was to be a people pleaser and the good girl.
All my actions were thoroughly scaled in a way that I would never get punished, instead I would be praised.
And even later on in life, most of the time I did what was expected from me.
And the few times, I did what I wanted to do, I felt resistance from my environment which of course was not pleasant.
Self-Denial according to the Merriam Webster Dictionary means ?A restraint or limitation of one?s own desires or interests?.
All that means is, that you are putting everyone else first and yourself last.
I like the way Sharon Pearson from the Coaching Institute in Melbourne describes how this 'Hiding' works.
She ssays there are Three Selves of YOU: CORE ? CRUD ? CRUST
1. CORE ? The Core is YOU where you have Self Worth, Self Trust, where you know you are enough and loveable.
It is where you feel joy, where you are fulfilled and live you purpose. This is where you know you can handle anything, no matter what.
And you are not afraid of consequences. This is where you own your energy and use it all for your advantage.
2. CRUD ? The Crud is where you go hiding. You are at a place of fear. It could be fear of being judged, fear of being shamed, fear of failure, you name it.
It is the place where you have Self Doubt where you listen to your crappy negative Self Talk and you don?t trust yourself either.
3. CRUST ? The CRUST is the Self that knows all about the fears and self doubt and wants to look good.
The Crust is the layer of yourself where you put all your energy into the hiding. You are constantly asking yourself on ?How can I hide my Crud??.
Which means, all you are doing is, hide your fears and your self doubts.
I am sure by now you are getting the picture on how much of your precious energy you are wasting on the ?Hiding?.
Wouldn?t you rather want to use your energy to achieve something extraordinary?
The reason why you built a Crud around your Core is, because you wanted to fit in when you were a child. And to fit in you started to play ?A ROLE?.
For me, two of my roles as I shared earlier on, were to be a People Pleaser and the Good Girl.
Imagine what you could achieve if all your energy was used to propelling you forward rather than being somebody you are not.
How rewarding would that be?
And how effortless would it be to just be YOU?
Watch out, in one of my next videos I am going to start talking about the different roles that you might have been playing or that you might still be playing.
I want you to become aware of why you do what you do, so you can start shifting layers to ultimately discover the ?REAL YOU? again.
Did You Find This Video Helpful?
If You did, Let me know what you think in the comments below!
And Feel Free to share this insight with your friends!
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