'Am I in a co-dependent relationship?
Read the Sad News: Most women have no awareness of not only being in a toxic relationship but being seriously co-dependent!!!!
I know this from my own experience. While I knew that I was very unhappy in my marriage, I did not have the slightest idea of being in co-dependency. For me it was natural to be there for my children and my husband and to care for their needs. Whatever it was and whoever needed me, I immediately jumped. Needless to say that I hardly ever did anything for myself. And if I did, I felt kind of guilty. The only thing that was all mine, was going on my early morning runs accompanied by my two lovely doggies when everybody else was still asleep. And to be honest, that was the thing that kept me going for so long because it kept my sanity in tact. In energized me for the day. Inhaling the fresh air, listening to the song of the birds above me, the colors of nature and the sound of my doggies paws plotting alongside in the grass made me recharge my batteries.
But how long did this charge of energy really last? I repeated it day by day and yet at the end of the day, sometimes I felt so exhausted. I remember me stepping into the car after closing up our restaurant with the need to literally 'explode'. And to release all that negativity, I screamed my head of on the way home because I knew that nobody could hear me. I screamed so hard that my voice almost tipped and my throat hurt! But it was relieve. Back home. I could feel the cutting edge, sharp, breath robbing energy and I had to wait until the morning to recharge on my run again.
Does any of that sound familiar? Well let me give you some of the signs for co-dependency so that you can identify whether it is true for your relationship:
10 Signs to watch out for:
- Walking on eggshells to avoid conflict with your partner
- Constantly making up excuses for your partner
- Having your words turned around against you
- Whatever you try, you can never get it right for him
- Downplaying problems
- Saying yes to certain things when really all you want, is to say no
- Coming up with white lies to avoid confrontation
- Telling yourself that he is quite a nice person, so really, there is no reason for being unhappy
- Avoiding conversation all together
- Not really wanting to come home when you know he is there
If you recognize some of the above signs in your relationship, then there is evidence that you are in a toxic relationship. You might not attend to your own needs because you would get in trouble for it. You don't stand up for yourself because you never learned to communicate your boundaries. And you might be so far down the track as I was that you think all of that is normal and that this is the way relationships look like. NO!!!!! That is not how it is meant to be?
In a healthy relationship there should be room for conversation, for love and care without strings attached. Nobody is supposed to be anyone's puppet. And each partner should have room for their own recreation because the needs differ from one human being to the other.
If you would like to have a conversation around that, I would love to offer you a FREE STRATEGY SESSION, which normally is valued at $ 150. I have room for two people, so get in quickly and get in touch with me! I truly want you to experience what life is about without being someone else's puppet.
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